I lived a life full of wanting more, driving to be better and better, and fighting for approval from parents, teachers, professors, coaches, bosses and many others. At home, in school, in sports, and at work, I was in constant competition to get ahead, to prove I am good enough or better than the next person. I am programmed to work hard, be my best at all I do and even try to please others. Not to say improving or being my best is wrong but in my relationship with God, I often feel I need to prove my worth through my actions. The better I perform, the more God will actually love me. This is not the way God works. A few scriptures have taught me that God and his love are very different from what I have understood love to be.
Reflecting on Love This Christmas
Mark Van Tine • December 9, 2022
I love this time of year. The winter, the snow, decorations, Christmas lights up everywhere, Christmas trees can be seen in windows, and every now and then some Christmas music. But most of all I love the family time with all of us together sipping on hot chocolate and hanging out around the family room.
The truth is most Christmas’ have not been this way for me. I have worked in retail for almost 30 years. This was the time of year that was so busy I often slept less and worked many overnights and early mornings. I worked much that I barely had time to celebrate with my family. I remember one Christmas I was home so little my wife, Lisa, and my two children, Josh and Kailee came to my work to visit me. We spent the night in a local hotel to be together so I wouldn’t have to spend more time away from them. I loved the idea of Christmas but did not love the commercialized version in which I was living.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. 9 As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8-9
“8 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast.” Ephesians 2:8-9
“38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39
I can think I am trying to work my way into God’s good grace but in reality, HE already loves me because of Jesus and there is nothing that can separate HIS love from me, I have already been given HIS grace. So, I can stop performing and start enjoying what God has given me. With life being so busy, working so hard to be my best, and striving to perform constantly, I need a way to find peace.
“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.” Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message Version)
Wow, my busy, tired, worn out, burned-out self can find a better way by simply choosing to walk and work with Jesus and learn from HIM. What really? It’s not about having more or taking more vacations to feel refreshed? That might help some. It’s about getting away and walking with Jesus, HE will show me how to take a real rest. It’s only as I find this rest in Jesus that I will be able to stop my striving and love others in a way that is pure and sacrificial. Jesus’ actions and HIS love will prompt me to give out that love HE has shown me.
“7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9 This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. 10 This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. 11 Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” 1 John 4:7-12
In this time of Advent, I reflect and remember Jesus and HIS love for me, just as I am. In turn, this inspires me to show my love for others throughout this season and each day forward.
- When was the last time you took time to remember how much Jesus loves you? Not your performance, not what you produce, but YOU?
- How could taking time to reflect on Jesus' love for you help you to better love others?